Crappy month

Funny, but I think the past 30 days have been up there at the top of my list of the crummiest month of my life. Seriously. The weeks before and after my divorce was final was pretty awful. The few weeks when I learned that I had an ovarian cyst that was growing any my mother had breast cancer were awful. A bout of post-partum depression after child No. 2 is right up there at the top of my list.

And, now there is this past month. Bone spurs. I can handle that. Abnormal pap smear. Ok, I can handle that. A lump in my left breast. *sigh* I can handle that. Then, there is the family issue that I don't really want to air out for the world. Maybe at some point I can, but not yet. But, it is the last straw. Please say a prayer for my brother.

I'm cleaning. It is my way of coping. I'll have to be up late tonight writing for that is what I had intended to do upon returning from running errands this morning. For now, I clean. My bathroom will sparkle as it never has. My husband hates chaos. He is a very orderly person and he struggles in how to help me deal with stress. But, I think, secretly, he loves it when I'm freaking out because our house is never so clean.