A swift kick in the ass

Now, don't go calling Child Protective Services. We all need/deserve a swift kick in the butt every now and then, but Child No. 2 -aka Zoom Zoom - has been treading water for a few days in dire need of it.

Yesterday he whined and back-talked so much that he spent at least two hours in his room in time-out including going to bed an hour early. He chose not to eat supper - he didn't want it- and opted to go to bed early with no meal.

Today, I pulled all the change out of the piggy bank so I had $7.57 to buy a large cheese pizza and order of Crazy Bread from Little Caesar's as a treat for me and the two little ones while Pickle visited his dad and Army of Dad was reffing adult soccer games.

I have warned and warned and warned Child No. 2 that I'm tired of telling him something three times and him ignoring me all three times until I get right in his face to MAKE him mind me. Today was no different. He is smart, too. Oho, he is a clever child. So, is Stinkerbelle, who isn't even 2. Both children know that if my hands are full or if I'm on the phone, they're pretty safe from discipline. But, did I have this child fooled today. As were leaving Little Caesar's, I told him (you guessed it) three times to stop pushing the door open. He was very politely holding it open for me and Stinkerbelle. But, we were out already and I asked him to close the door. Instead he continued to push it farther and farther open. I feared that it would do one of those automatic lock things and require an employee to come close it again. No reason for that to happen if he would listen. Well, I had one hand carrying the pizza and crazy bread and the other hand tirelessly gripping the arm of a squirmy soon-to-be 2-year-old dying (ooh, poor choice of words) to run into the parking lot. So, I had no hands free. I could see the wheels turning in his mischievous Dennis the Menace mind. Hmm, mom has her hands full so *calculating the odds in his head* I can pretty much do what I want and I won't get a swat on the ass. Haha!!! After the third warning, I said I MEAN IT. CLOSE THE DOOR! He pushed it as far open as it could go, so I did a move that professional dancers everywhere would have been jealous of and made like a flamingo leg, bent at the knee in a 90-degree angle and kicked him in the little ass. The look of shock on his face was priceless. Had I not been so mad, I would have laughed. He says to me HEY! And I looked at him with every bit of mommy anger in me and said I told you that I was going to bust your ass if you didn't listen to me the FIRST time I tell you to do something. Guess what? Since then, he has listened to me. Ok, it has only been an hour, but hey ... small baby steps!!!