Army of Mom

So this is how liberty dies ... with thunderous applause.

1.21.2005

Remember this?

I woke up in the middle of the night and something made me think of Burger King and then it just popped into my head. The Humpty Dance with the verse about getting busy in a BK restroom. Digital Underground, where are you now? The lyrics, well, they fall short of a true poet, I think. Makes me weep for Top 40 radio and what my children will be listening to when they're out of my earshot. I used to LOVE this song and I look at the words and think that maybe I had a screw or two loose in my noggin back then. Ok, maybe still now, because I still like it, just wouldn't let my kids listen to it.

Favorite line of the song: hey yo fat girl, c'mere--are ya ticklish? Yeah, I called ya fat. Look at me, I'm skinny It never stopped me from gettin' busy I'm a freak I like the girls with the boom I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom I'm crazy.

Do I count as a girl with a boom? Does that mean a big butt? I'm not really on the down low with the latest sayings. I'm about as white bread as a person can get.

Lyrics courtesy of Leo's Lyrics.
From the album "Sex Packets"
Verse One: Humpty Hump (Shock G) All right! Stop whatcha doin' 'cause I'm about to ruin the image and the style that ya used to. I look funny but yo I'm makin' money see so yo world I hope you're ready for me. Now gather round I'm the new fool in town and my sound's laid down by the Underground. I drink up all the Hennessey ya got on ya shelf so just let me introduce myself My name is Humpty, pronounced with a Umpty. Yo ladies, oh how I like to hump thee. And all the rappers in the top ten--please allow me to bump thee. I'm steppin' tall, y'all, and just like Humpty Dumpty you're gonna fall when the stereos pump me. I like to rhyme, I like my beats funky, I'm spunky. I like my oatmeal lumpy. I'm sick wit dis, straight gangsta mack but sometimes I get ridiculous I'll eat up all your crackers and your licorice hey yo fat girl, c'mere--are ya ticklish? Yeah, I called ya fat. Look at me, I'm skinny It never stopped me from gettin' busy I'm a freak I like the girls with the boom I once got busy in a Burger King bathroom I'm crazy. Allow me to amaze thee. They say I'm ugly but it just don't faze me. I'm still gettin' in the girls' pants and I even got my own dance {Chorus:} The Humpty Dance is your chance to do the hump Do the Humpty Hump, come on and do the Humpty Hump Do the Humpty Hump, just watch me do the Humpty Hump Do ya know what I'm doin', doin' the Humpty Hump Do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump

Verse Two: People say "Yo, Humpty, you're really funny lookin'" that's all right 'cause I get things cookin' Ya stare, ya glare, ya constantly try to compare me but ya can't get near me I give 'em more, see, and on the floor, B, all the girls they adore me Oh yes, ladies, I'm really bein' sincere 'cause in a 69 my humpty nose will tickle ya rear. My nose is big, uh-uh I'm not ashamed Big like a pickle, I'm still gettin' paid I get laid by the ladies, ya know I'm in charge, both how I'm livin' and my nose is large I get stoopid, I shoot an arrow like Cupid, I use a word that don't mean nothin', like looptid I sang on Doowhutchalike, and if ya missed it, I'm the one who said just grab 'em in the biscuits Also told ya that I like to bite Well, yeah, I guess it's obvious, I also like to write. All ya had to do was give Humpty a chance and now I'm gonna do my dance. {Chorus} Breakdown: Oh, yeah, that's the break, y'all Let me hear a little bit of that bass groove right here Oh, yeah! Now that I told ya a little bit about myself let me tell ya a little bit about this dance It's real easy to do--check it out

Verse Three: First I limp to the side like my leg was broken Shakin' and twitchin' kinda like I was smokin' Crazy wack funky People say ya look like M.C. Hammer on crack, Humpty That's all right 'cause my body's in motion It's supposed to look like a fit or a convulsion Anyone can play this game This is my dance, y'all, Humpty Hump's my name No two people will do it the same Ya got it down when ya appear to be in pain Humpin', funkin', jumpin', jig around, shakin' ya rump, and when the dude a chump pump points a finger like a stump tell him step off, I'm doin' the Hump. {Chorus} Black people, do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump White people, do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump Puerto Ricans, do the Humpty Hump, just keep on doin' the hump Samoans, do the Humpty Hump, do the Humpty Hump Let's get stoopid! {Chorus} Oh, yeah, come on and break it down Outro: Once again, the Underground is in the house I'd like to send a shout out to the whole world, keep on doin' the Humpty Dance, and to the ladies, peace and humptiness forever {Music and fade}

Ok, Army of Mom readers, do the Humpty Hump. Listen to a sample here.

0 Comments:

Post a Comment

<< Home