Lawyer season opens
WASHINGTON, D.C. -- A White House source stated that Congress is considering awarding Vice President DickCheney the Medal of Freedom, the national highest civilian commendation, for his act of bravery in shooting an attorney.
The source was quoted to say, "All Americans have wanted to shoot a lawyer at one time or another, and Cheney actually had the balls to do it."
In a related story, the Texas Department of Parks and Wildlife, which issues hunting licenses, said that it will start requiring hunters wishing to bag a lawyer to have the new "lawyers' stamp" on their hunting licenses. Currently, Texas hunters are required to carry stamps for hunting birds, deer and feral hogs, at a cost of $7 annually. The new "lawyers' stamp" will cost $100, but open season will be all year long.
The department further stated that although the "lawyers' stamp" comes at hefty price, sales have been brisk and it is believed it will generate revenue in excess of $3 billion the first year. Other states are considering similar hunting license stamps.
Hunters with the "lawyers' stamp" will have to keep in mind the fair chase provisions of lawyer hunting. No hunting within 100 yards of a traffic accident or job injury site, as this is considered hunting using a baited field.
The source was quoted to say, "All Americans have wanted to shoot a lawyer at one time or another, and Cheney actually had the balls to do it."
In a related story, the Texas Department of Parks and Wildlife, which issues hunting licenses, said that it will start requiring hunters wishing to bag a lawyer to have the new "lawyers' stamp" on their hunting licenses. Currently, Texas hunters are required to carry stamps for hunting birds, deer and feral hogs, at a cost of $7 annually. The new "lawyers' stamp" will cost $100, but open season will be all year long.
The department further stated that although the "lawyers' stamp" comes at hefty price, sales have been brisk and it is believed it will generate revenue in excess of $3 billion the first year. Other states are considering similar hunting license stamps.
Hunters with the "lawyers' stamp" will have to keep in mind the fair chase provisions of lawyer hunting. No hunting within 100 yards of a traffic accident or job injury site, as this is considered hunting using a baited field.
3 Comments:
At 1:32 PM, February 28, 2006,
Anonymous said…
Strange, it is legal to hunt over bait for most game in Texas...I guess they consider them to be a migratory animal.
At 8:49 PM, February 28, 2006,
Army of Mom said…
Well, I suppose if you only tempted them with an intersection known for car wrecks, that might be different.
At 6:43 AM, March 01, 2006,
Anonymous said…
Yeah, that would be fine...it is just like hunting along game trails.
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