Tales of the uterus

Nothing like starting off the day being light-sabered (as my friend and editor referred to it). I can honestly say that this was one of the few times with lube, a condom and an electronic device being inserted into my vagina by another person was not fun. I mean, come on, it has all the ingredients to sound like a good time, right?

But, alas, Nurse Ratchett was not going to allow this to be fun. With a bedside manner described best as stoic, the tech was all business and wanded me with apparent great finesse and before I knew it, she was leaving a rose on the nightstand, smoking a cig and telling me to get my fat ass dressed so she could take care of the next gal.

Let me say, though, that sitting in a waiting room full of women who are 8 months pregnant when it is 92 degrees outside remind me why I had my tubes tied. Oh good grief. These poor waddling women fanning themselves with Parenting magazine made me smile and thank God that I won't be doing that again any time soon.

TMI, but I went to my annual a week or two ago and apparently my answers to the doctor's questions revealed that I suffer from Menorrhagia. You think its gross? Imagine being me. So, anyway. This has been going on for about a year, maybe more. But, I didn't know that it was anything but my lack of good luck that I was dealing with it.

So, doc sends me in for the wanding. He speculated that it could be anything from a polyp to fibroids to Adenomyosis. So, Nurse Ratchett found a polyp. According to the MayoClinic, they are small, benign growths on the lining of the uterine wall, which may cause heavy or prolonged menstrual bleeding. Polyps of the uterus most commonly occur in women of reproductive age as the result of high hormone levels. *I'm guessing the high hormone levels explain my erratic mood swings, huh?* The Adenomyosis occurs when glands from the endometrium become embedded in the uterine muscle, often causing heavy bleeding and pain. Adenomyosis is most likely to develop if you're a middle-aged woman who has had many children, according to the MayoClinic. I guess three counts for middle. I also read that if you've had c-sections, it can be a contributor to this, as well.

So, the solution is to have a D and C (dilation and curettage). The doctor opens (dilates) the cervix and then scrapes or suctions tissue from the lining of the uterus to reduce menstrual bleeding. Although this procedure is common and often treats menorrhagia successfully, additional D and C procedures may be needed if menorrhagia recurs. Doesn't this sound like fun? While he's in there, we'll do an dndometrial ablation, too. Using ultrasonic energy, the doctor permanently destroys the entire lining of the uterus (endometrium). After endometrial ablation, most women have normal menstrual flow. However, some women have little or no menstrual flow after the procedure. The doctor said a hysterectomy is the only way to "cure" the problem, but since I'm a good 15 years from menopause, that really isn't an option we want. So, this may be the next best thing.

But, the busy gal that I am, I've asked to put this off till the new year. Not only will the timing, perhaps, be better, but if I've got to meet a $1000 deductible, why not do it when I can benefit from it for the rest of the year. Doc said that seemed fine.

I would like to hear any stories anyone has about their procedures. I know one reader said she wasn't happy with hers. My friend, Kelvinator, had it done and loves life ever since with barely a cycle each month.